The other day after a long day’s work I decided to watch some TV and happened on a bio pic about the model, Gia. Sadly, she died young of AIDS related to IV drug use. Throughout the move characters that represented Gia’s family and friends spoke about her. One thing that was talked about was an ongoing story she wrote when she was a little girl. She wrote about a girl with golden curls that everyone thought was beautiful. This girl with the golden hair lived in a beautiful house. The word beautiful was a running theme in her story. Gia herself had dark hair. Her mother was notably focused on Gia’s looks, noticing Gia’s pimples when she was in the process of detoxing from Heroine and making comments about her makeup. Gia was involved in a tumultuous attraction and relationship with another woman. That woman had blonder hair. She besieges this women with rooms of golden roses and calls her constantly until she finally tracks he down at her home. When she sees her she tells her “ You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen”
Gia not consider herself beautiful and had no sense of herself. She was terrified of being abandoned and clung desperately to her lover. She used drugs to kill the sense of discontent in herself. She found no sense in life.
It was clear from seeing Gia with her lover that Gia wasn’t having a relationship with this woman but what she needed that woman to be for her. To Gia, this was the beautiful girl she never got a chance to be because her mother never saw her real beauty. To Gia This was the (more…)